I know we worry our kids have lately not been feeling good, or actually feeling scared because of what is happening in our world right now. I know because I have a daughter who tells me that she is feeling it too. According to her- just a little bit. But I think I have a solution to that. We’ve created a book called It’s All Okay and I have a good feeling that it will help our kids feel safe and happy during this strange time. There is no cap on the age range, I’ve had adults tell me that it’s a book that is soothing to them too. So even if you are an adult, do read this to your own inner child in addition to your children.
The Virus That Shall Not Be Named
This book has been written with one and only one intention- to make the child reading it feel safe. And to this effect- there is no mention whatsoever to the coronavirus or COVID-19. It’s not an attempt to brush it under the carpet, but more to take the power away from the fear it is wielding currently.The feeling of security also comes with the fact that it is their special time with you. That YOU- the parent or grown up they trust more than anyone else in the world is telling them that “It’s All Okay”.
The Opposite of Love is Not Hate- It’s Fear
What we don’t understand, we fear. Whether it’s people, places or phenomenons. And fear always stems from the unknown or something we don’t understand or can’t predict. So then we can imagine that our children, whom we have worked so hard on, to keep happy, loved and secured are suddenly feeling lost, confused, disrupted and anxious. So explain to your kids in a very matter-of-fact tone that this is what is happening around the world, but that it’s all A-okay!! And double down on love.
Love, hugs, cuddles, talks, walks & board games!
Focus on The Constants Rather Than The Changes
More than anything else, children crave stability and security. When I was writing out the lines to this story/poem I wanted to bring in that safe feeling of stability in the minds of our children. Yes there’s a lot that’s going wrong but so much that is still right and just perfect. Whether it’s the rhythm of nature or their own parents. We still have that and it is what allows us to do everything else. So we turn their focus on those things.
The Power Of Affirmation
Every time you say “I love you” to your child, you affirm to them that they are loved. Every time they say it back to you, they are affirming it for you. There is immense power in repetitions and affirmations. What we say, we become. The human mind is very pliable in both positive & negative directions. Keeping this in mind, the story is also written in first person. As in the child is reading it out loud and to themselves. As you read this story every night, please do not skip the “Dear Grown Up” page. This is where the child affirms what they do need and have to feel safe and happy.
If We Can Teach Our Children Love, We Can Teach Them Resilience
As bad as it looks, this is a fantastic, almost controlled environment time to teach them some resilience. Teach them how to tide through the “not-so-good times” or the “ups and downs” of life. And how does one do that? By teaching them positive coping skills- to always be looking upward and onward. If you’re a beginner rock climber, and a nervous one at that- do you think it’s good practice to be looking down? No! But perhaps as you get better and better, you will start to accept your nerves and perhaps one day.. enjoy the heights. Same with life! Our children WILL face the crests and troughs that this beautiful life has to offer- this is our moment to ride them through and get them out feeling okay!
They Know When We Don’t Mean It
Our children are far more intuitive than we comprehend them to be. You would know this is true if you’ve been caught lying or being dishonest about your feelings or statements when you talk to them. Oh they know for sure! Even the little ones who have just got a bearing on their communication. They know. So when you ask them not to be afraid, you need to not be afraid. Otherwise they will pick up on those subtle vibes and not trust the words coming out from your mouth. Either that or you try to be the greatest actor that you can!
Trust Your Future- How I Deal With My Grown Up Fears
...so I don’t pass them on to my child. There is a lovely book I read called “Happy Money” by Ken Honda. One of the things he talks about in the book is allowing yourself to trust the future. Trust that you have been taken care of until now. That you’re here. That you’re okay. And that your future will be too. The last page of the children’s book talks about just that- let’s trust that “this world” or “the energy that runs this world” is old, and funny and wise- it knows what it’s doing. Every time I find myself getting lost in the articles and videos and forwards doing the rounds, I tell myself this. I trust my future. Try it, it’s a deeply impactful statement to be telling ourselves right now.
It’s All Okay
I promise you. We got each other’s back. It’s all okay. Even if me, a random stranger showed up at your door and asked you for a meal, you would share yours with me. A lot of people in your life would do the same for you. If you know you have anxious neighbours or personalities who might be feeling insecure, make them a meal and drop it off at their doorstep. Or call them up. Let them know you care about them. It will tell them that “It’s All Okay”
Spread The Word In Your Communities & Schools
I say this with the utmost respect, love and understanding that not all parents are equipped with the emotional quotient to be taking care of their children’s emotional needs. As they say- you cannot pour from an empty cup. And if what they say is true- that it takes a village, then now is the time to be that village for all of our children. We don’t want this to leave an impact on our kids. It takes a lifetime to shake off trauma of any kind.
Either ways please spread this post and the free ebook out to your parent friends, teachers & schools.
Hi! My name is Sophia! Welcome to ChildBeWild.com, where we design beautiful, meaningful decor for babies & kids. Our blog here is a design psychology playground where I explore concepts and ideas around building spaces for our young ones! I'm also Mama to a sprightly 9 (almost 10, but we'll hang onto 9 for as long as we can) year old who is the inspiration behind everything you see on ChildBeWild.